time to blog

Good morning -- wide awake @ 2 am, which has it's good and bad points. Guess I've been sleeping on and off all evening, so it doesn't really matter. I have to keep remindind myself what day it really is because I am off for 2 weeks.

Not good timeing to be off --- need to be at work, but drs orders. I have another blood clot -- this one is in my thigh. I'm not in the hospital, so I guess it's not worse than the one a few years ago...but I hate that blot clots kill. Just puts things in perspective of what really matters. I've been under so much stress in the late few months worrying about home, love, money, being good enough at work.... and as they say with a blod clot I was kinda a walking time bomb.

I still feel like I am at a crossroads in my life -- maybe I'm just standing there frozen on what to do. I have a person that I consider to be a role model, but it seems as if that person has withdrawn all communication with me. And I am very sad. It's hard to find someone who admire, and also you feel understands the changes you feel you must make in order to make the best choice at the fork in the road. My heart feels heavy as I wish I just had an opportunity to speak to this person and clear up what ever is up.

If you're reading my blog - feel free to follow me.
I promise there will be more art and crafts.
I'm going to start a painting.... well maybe in just a few minutes. Why not, I can't sleep ;-)

Namaste'